Sex(ism) and the Geek

 
Today I was surfing, trying to find some new, geek websites, and I came across "The Mary Sue" and their recent article, The Dark Side of Geekification.  I won't say much about the website in general, except it is a geek site for women with an appeal to a broader audience.  The article itself focuses on how as the previously marginalized, obscure geek culture is steadily becoming a larger part of pop culture, the expectations of geek women, in both competency and appearacne, are starting to reflect the popular standard of beauty.  In  other words, geekgirls now have to know everything about their respective verses/games while also looking like Olivia Munn.  But trust me when I say, that gaming, reading books, watching tv/movies, and blogging don't exactly challenge the physical prowess of the geek community - whatever sex you might be.




In particular, one of the comments on the article , from Ejambe, caught my eye:

It goes the other way as well. You are complaining about how geeks treat an fantasy they've never met in real life - let me inform you how they actually treat those people. I won't go so far as to say "I'm hot", but I'm a professional programmer who also loves fashion. To me, it's an art form - I enjoy it as much as I enjoy my more stereotypically geeky interests. In theory, I should be the "best of both worlds" type - but in reality, my interests isolate me even more. Far from being worshipped, I am ignored, looked down upon, and considered not part of the club, because of how I dress. No one will take me seriously unless I prove myself ten times over, because I don't display those traditional geek markers. The people I work with only believe female programmers are capable if they dress plainly (not to say that those girls get it by default - guys still won't accept you straight out, no matter how stereotypically nerdy you may be!).

The reason for this contradiction is that they don't actually want a supermodel who is a nerd. In real life, they want a supermodel who will listen to them talk about their interests and find those interests attractive, but not one who is actually good at those things. That would be threatening their geekdom!

While I obviously can't speak to how attractive Ejambe is, I do agree with her point:  Geeks, in particular male geeks, do not want their pride threatened by someone who is not only more physically attractive, but also  a "better" geek, than they are.

Now, to say that aloud might seem pompous; but, it is a true that there are disproportionately fewer attractive geek males than geek females; and, as a female, I am constantly being reminded of how important my appearance is in both my personal and professional life.  I'm not saying men don't hear this as well, but this article at Pajiba, which highlights the difference in what it means to be an "ugly woman" and what it means to be an "ugly man" in pop culture, illustrates how those expectations are far from equal.

I included the following comment on the page:

I think your commentary highlights the problem that this article begins to hint at: that women have to face this hurtle of acceptance whether as geeks or in "geeky" professions - be either attractive or competent, but not both.  Few men (and even some women), are comfortable with a women being both outside of their fantasies; and, when that competency is in a sub-culture in which others previously found solidarity, it becomes a threat more than an attraction.

Geekgirls have always existed, but (for reasons the articles touches upon) were never really out in the open.  In a sub-culture that, until recently, has been dominated by men, the intrusion of real women into the fold is uncomfortable/threatening/choose your term to indicate unwelcome.

I've been a geekgirl and nerd my entire life.  I loved Dragon Ball Z, and was so excited when I saw a wall scroll in one of my guy friend's room.  I immediately started talking about it and other anime/manga I liked, and asking him what he enjoyed.  He was so surprised that he told all the guys in school I liked "cool" DZ, and then never talked to me about it again.  For a few weeks following the "revelation", they would randomly ask me questions - as though testing me; but, eventually relented when I didn't fail.  I finally asked him years later why they never talked to me about DZ or invited me to their watch parties or over to game, and he told me that at the time it was just weird that a girl liked DZ and other nerdy things that were for boys.

Now it seems that Boy's Club mentality is becoming more prevalent, even among older geeks.

Totally heart Bell, but the average geekgirl does not look like this in that bikini.

Having seen this "beauty or brains" mentality in various fields (i.e., law, business, the military, even amongst teachers), I had hoped the geek community, usually existing as a fringe community, would not be so quick to embrace it as it was absorbed into popular culture; but, it has been - and created some pompous results along the way.  Now, I can either be compared to a living fantasy (i.e., Munn, or her more realistic counterparts, Felicia Day and Kristen Bell) or I have to be a stereotypical not-ugly-but-not-obviously-attractive, competent, geek girl.



One thing I always loved about being a geek was that it didn't matter how I looked.  I didn't need to dress frumpy, wear glasses, or have a Star Wars binder to prove myself.  I could dress like a maid or a Ghostbuster (no, not the sexy Halloween costume), and they were both acceptable.  Now, geek girls are expected to wear Sexy insert character name.  There has always been sex in sci-fi and fantasy, possibly due to a less prudish audience; but, now it is rampant and pointless (i.e., Star Trek: Enterprise, SG:U - but that's a post for another day; and, SG-1 stopped having gratuitous nudity/sex long before the season  switch to Scifi from Showtime).

This photo isn't bad, but the filming of other "decontamination scenes" was unnecessarily sexually suggestive for  a Star Trek episode.

I know you're going to have sex, but I don't need nudity to imply that.

I'm all for being sexy, but, I don't want it to be expected; and, that is the difference now: the expectation.  Some girls grew-up wanting to look like Barbie; but, most geekgirls I know, grew up wanting to be Princess Leia.  One role-model is not like the other.  I'm not saying women shouldn't want to be pretty; but, they should have the freedom to define what that means for themselves.  If this trend is just temporary, then fine; but, as a new generation of geekgirls grow-up with Femmebots for role models, and adult geek women are increasingly expected to look like them, what it fundamentally means to be a geek will change - and not for the better.